Do you really want to hurt me George? Boy George you really have to get a new hobby, this chaining male escorts to bedroom walls ain’t working for ya. OK, Ok alleged! You know 20 years ago Audun Carlsen wouldn’t have been complaining about getting slapped around by a superstar, but now Boy George is merely a plump middle aged George O’Dowd “the DJ” , well, you know, he is an easy target (ala Gary Glitter).It is alleged that Mr Dowd went on a wild rampage in his home attacking the male escort because he believed he was hacking into his laptop (a computer, silly!). Another man, also present at the time, helped Mr Dowd chain up Mr Carlsen to a bed hook before he was whacked by the hysterical 80’s rock star. Mr Carlsen described the scene to jurors “George was slapping me and beating me and punching me and screaming things.”Hmm, and that just sounds like any old gay tiff, if you ask me. Somehow he managed to screw himself off the wall and flee, wearing only boxer shorts, trainers and a pair of handcuffs (so many lines so few time!). He ran into a news agency where the owner rang the police (to make a report) and the fire brigade (to cut the friggin handcuffs off!). Mr Carlsen also claims prior to the attack Mr Dowd had been sending him bizarre emails on the Gaydar site they both frequented. In one email Boy George ranted about how “a fixated lesbian” had cloned his computer and was operating it remotely from the United States.Hmm, please don’t tell me George is a lesbian? Oh it is all so confusing! Gosh, if he is found guilty I suggest he wears soap-on-a rope in jail, just to be on the safe side or then again, maybe not! The trial continues…

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