Ah shit, where’s my lizard poo? That shit took me 7 years to collect people! Daniel Bennett from Leeds University is rightly pissed after the Uni threw out his seven year collection of lizard excrement (ooh, about 35kg). The student had traveled into the deepest darkest regions of the Philippines collecting the bowel movements of a rare Butaan lizard (reli of the Komodo dragon if you really want to know?) to study its eating habits etc.For five long years Mr Bennet sifted and toiled with the Butaan droppings before he won himself a scholarship to Leeds (yay PhD thesis on lizard poo). All hail Leeds University! Mr Bennett continued his shit sifting and was on a field trip when a technician threw his entire collection out. When he returned he discovered his desk had been cleaned and his shit gone. The uni eventually offered an apology and £500 in compo but too little too late, he is suing.

Psychologists at the University of St Andrews in Scotland, renowned as the home of golf,  believe they have discovered the “holy grail” of golf. Don’t think.

Hmm, most golf coaches have known that one for ever. The problem is how does one stop a person thinking? The University of St Andrews believe just talking about your game in between playing shots can effect your skills and score. The medical mumbo jumbo is called ‘verbal overshadowing’ which makes the brain switch focus from the cerebral systems (skill related) to language related part of the brain.

I say phooey, if you want to really know the key to playing great golf you need to act like a squirrel. Squirrels, surprise, surprise, don’t think. It is the reason they are able to scurry across a thin wire and not fall off. Us humans, we think,  process and analyze. If we were told to walk a thin wire like a squirrel, we couldn’t, mainly because our brain would be working overtime analyzing the situation. Our brain would be thinking , crap that’s too high, the friggin wires too thin, I will die doing it, isn’t there an easier alternative, blah, blah, blah. A squirrel however is denied the complex assessment of information and has no ability to reason. It simply processes, acts and executes.

So next time you pick up your clubs find your inner squirrel and just go for it. Oh and if you want a really cool assessment of your golf  by a world  leading golf coach check out this site Free Golf Lesson Online.

Did they really have to do a study to discover that male science nerds were the most likely to be virgins than anyone else on campus? That’s like DAH! The research by Melissa Kang, included 185 students from the University of Sydney.Her studies showed that male science students were least likely to have had sexual intercourse whilst female art students were the most active in that department (go girls).Despite all the professionals coming up with all kind of excuses like work ethic, devotion to the lab and boys having sex later than girls, blah, blah, blah, the bottom line is, geeks find it harder to get laid. Maybe they should seriously consider shifting the labs nearer to the Arts building? Just a suggestion, gosh!

Hmm, I don’t know if this is friggin cruel or friggin funny. Scientists from the Pacific University of Oregon built the shrimp treadmill to see how far the little blighter would travel for food. Professor David Scholnick, heading the experiment, was surprised to discover the super fit crustacean could jog for hours without a break at speeds of 66ft per minute (yeah or was it so scared it was running on pure adrenalin?). Even more surprising was that his little science experiment video of the exercising creature became an instant hit on YouTube. Wanna see it?

What happens when NASA send two orb weave spiders into outer space for 3 months? Hmm, well a friggin wacky web for starters. Yep, zero gravity just messes with them and also their webs.The normally symmetrical web building spiders, who were sent up to the International space station for some experiments, are having  trouble weaving in zero gravity. OK, well a lot of trouble. Astronauts were a little surprised when they had a peak in the specially  built spider enclosure and discovered  a freaky tangled 3 dimensional silk mess. The spiders have either lost the plot or the zero gravity is messing with there co-ordination. To make matters worse one of the spiders has now gone AWOL (probably upset about web mess) and hasn’t been seen for days. Luckily they didn’t send up the bird eating Orb Spiders. In space nobody can hear you scream!

Who is Thomas Hayne Cutbush you may well ask? Well he was the nephew of a Scotland Yard superintendent and the prime suspect in the Jack the Ripper case (3 April 1888 to 13 February 1891). Call him psychopath, call him mentally ill the guy was a scary freak that even his family believed could have been Jack.Reason? Because he stayed up all night prowling the streets of London and would come home covered in mud and blood (hello!).Oh and I forgot, he loved reading medical books. So why, pray tell, am I telling you all this? Well wouldn’t you know it, Broadmoor Britain’s first criminal asylum has just opened up its 1,500 case files to the public and that includes Cutbush’s. Under the Freedom of Information legislation the asylum could no longer hide the inmates personal info from the public. Ooh criminally insane file means quality reading for hundreds of authors looking for fresh fodder. So I guess the most popular file (20 documents) is that of Thomas Hayne Cutbush. Already one of the Cutbush’s documents has unearthed some interesting facts describing him as having “brilliant blue eyes” and a “limp” just as an eyewitness had described to police. Another mentions Cutbush’s psycho rants which included how he would “rip” the staff open with a knife (little charmer). Despite initially being the prime suspect he was later committed and removed from the Ripper list because he was related to someone in Scotland Yard (in other words cover-up).The superintendent later killed himself when a newspaper released the name of his nephew to the public. Interestingly the Broadmoor files include other Ripper suspects such as James Kelly so don’t be surprised if you see a tsunami of Jack the Ripper theories and books real soon. Oh and if you want to do a little investigative work on Jack and 1499 other inmates of Broadmoor Asylum click here Berkshire Record Office. Knock yourself out.

Oxford have just released a top ten list of annoying phrases and here they are…

1. At the end of the day
2. Fairly unique
3. I personally
4. At this moment in time
5. With all due respect
6. Absolutely
7. It’s a nightmare
8. Shouldn’t of
9. 24/7
10.It’s not rocket science

Friggin Loons List of Most Irritating Phrases

The Friggin loon has also just released a top ten list of annoying phrases and here they are…

1. Insufficient funds
2. Error: Windows System Restore Utility Quits and All Restore Points Are Deleted (that one’s a bitch!)
3. Please contact your service provider
4. You have the right to remain silent
5. Like Fries with that?
6. Incorrect password
7. Card Declined
8. Google it
9. An operator will be with you shortly
10.404 File Not Found

Well, men who are overly drawn to their feminine side may be relieved to know it is all in their genes. You got to love science. Aussie researchers have identified a link between a male transsexualism and a gene. Oh boy,  if you have an extra long androgen receptor gene it may explain why you have a deep desire to don on a frock or two. This extra long gene may cause weaker testosterone signals and trigger the feminine side. The research included analysing DNA from 112 transsexual volunteers .Professor Vincent Harley says “There is a social stigma that transsexualism is simply a lifestyle choice, however our findings support a biological basis of how gender identity develops.”

New research has suggested that drinking more than three cups of coffee a day shrinks women’s breasts. Well, that will explain a few things then, wont it? Sweden’s Lunds University surveyed around 300 women and discovered a link between coffee and smaller breasts. It all has to do with a gene (a bad one by the sounds of it).  Helena Jernstroem, a lecturer in experimental oncology at the University says “Coffee-drinking women do not have to worry their breasts will shrink to nothing overnight. They will get smaller, but the breasts aren’t just going to disappear.” Gee that’s comforting lady! But don’t go running to herbal teas just yet, the researchers  believe that regular caffeine intake MAY reduce the risk of breast cancer.It’s not going to bring my boobs back , but it ain’t all bad news. So I wonder if coffee shrinks anything on men?

The 1970’s disco anthem ‘Stayin Alive’ by the Bee Gees, has hit the charts again, though this time it is the medical charts. Seems the brothers Gibb have found a new niche, it requires the same type of audience, white suited, but they just don’t dance, they compress.Doctors are using the song ‘Stayin Alive’ to help medical students get the right timing for administering CPR to heart attack victims. Evidently it is trickier than George Clooney made out. CPR is administered at 100 compressions per minute and ‘Stayin Alive’ beats at 103 per minute (perfect). So the song is being played to help students gets the CPR rhythm right (who knew!).And it should be noted for the record that Dr. David Matlock ,of the University of Illinois College of Medicine at Peoria, is to blame for all of this! Yep, the song is now destined to be part of the medical curriculum forever.Bastard! Hmm, I wonder if you CPR to Staying Alive you are breaking copyright infringement laws? Gosh, imagine if a doctor forgot how the song went or had bad musical timing.Oh dear, another thing to sue a doctor for. Dear god, imagine if Dr David Matlock had listened to Billy Ray Cyrus!